Thursday, September 30, 2004
The Party of India... or India Party?
I am considering starting my own political party. I plan to call it the "Let's Not Be Stupid" party. Major Platforms:
- A Balanced Budget Amendment to the Constitution
- Civil Rights (specifically, Marriage For Everyone, but I hate referring to "Gay Marriage" as different from "Hetero-Marriage." I want to get rid of "marriage" as a legal term in favor of "civil unions." The definition of "marriage" would now be "a civil union performed in a church." "Gay Civil Union Rights" sounds stupid, so we're just going to refer to them as "Civil Rights". It's also a rhetorial device that allows us to play off of the un-PC-ness of discriminating against black people.)
- Comprehensive Sex Education in Public Schools. We can emphasize abstinence too, since that is the only 100% way to avoid STDs and pregnancy, but we're also talking about birth control and condoms. And we're showing that "Miracle of Birth" video that reminds me of "Red Asphalt," as well as pictures of diseased gentiles.
- Foreign language in elementary school. Not only is it easier to learn that stuff when you're young, considering the growing Hispanic population, in some areas it would just be a very easy way to avoid pretending like English is not a second language for some kids.
- Restoring funding for fine arts in public schools. Yes, the math scores are awful, but taking art class away to buy SAT prep books for everyone is not only boring, it's a stupid idea. Let's aim for well rounded adults, not OCD people who only know how to fill in circles with a #2 pencil.
- More clean, safe and reliable public transit. You can take the train all over Europe, but not in this country. Our steel people are already hurting, so instead of a stupid tariff, let's build more railroads!
- Making Friends with the EU/Asia. Let's go back to history kids. Yes, the 1920s were awesome, and isolationism was fun for a while, but let's not forget what happened after that. Plus, terrorism is a world problem, so it should be obvious that teamwork is necessary, and by "teamwork" I do not mean "US and Britain." We're not that awesome, and we're probably going lose our spot as "World Bad-Ass" here shortly, so we'll need friends. (and people to loan us money when the world switches from the dollar to the Euro as the monetary standard and our economy tanks). Plus, we don't want to be France.
That's all on the platform so far. I'm open to suggestions for other positions, like where would we stand on Free Trade? I'm for it, personally, but not for any good reasons. I think I just like the word "free". I'm also pro-not-fucking-up-the-environment, but I don't really know how to implement that. Maybe we should have an environmental summit, sort of a Big Business meets Hippie Tree Huggers in a "When Harry Met Sally" kind of thing.
Oh! And let's not forget our mascot. (And yes, I already own this one, thanks to The Whitley.)
Cue the balloons!
- A Balanced Budget Amendment to the Constitution
- Civil Rights (specifically, Marriage For Everyone, but I hate referring to "Gay Marriage" as different from "Hetero-Marriage." I want to get rid of "marriage" as a legal term in favor of "civil unions." The definition of "marriage" would now be "a civil union performed in a church." "Gay Civil Union Rights" sounds stupid, so we're just going to refer to them as "Civil Rights". It's also a rhetorial device that allows us to play off of the un-PC-ness of discriminating against black people.)
- Comprehensive Sex Education in Public Schools. We can emphasize abstinence too, since that is the only 100% way to avoid STDs and pregnancy, but we're also talking about birth control and condoms. And we're showing that "Miracle of Birth" video that reminds me of "Red Asphalt," as well as pictures of diseased gentiles.
- Foreign language in elementary school. Not only is it easier to learn that stuff when you're young, considering the growing Hispanic population, in some areas it would just be a very easy way to avoid pretending like English is not a second language for some kids.
- Restoring funding for fine arts in public schools. Yes, the math scores are awful, but taking art class away to buy SAT prep books for everyone is not only boring, it's a stupid idea. Let's aim for well rounded adults, not OCD people who only know how to fill in circles with a #2 pencil.
- More clean, safe and reliable public transit. You can take the train all over Europe, but not in this country. Our steel people are already hurting, so instead of a stupid tariff, let's build more railroads!
- Making Friends with the EU/Asia. Let's go back to history kids. Yes, the 1920s were awesome, and isolationism was fun for a while, but let's not forget what happened after that. Plus, terrorism is a world problem, so it should be obvious that teamwork is necessary, and by "teamwork" I do not mean "US and Britain." We're not that awesome, and we're probably going lose our spot as "World Bad-Ass" here shortly, so we'll need friends. (and people to loan us money when the world switches from the dollar to the Euro as the monetary standard and our economy tanks). Plus, we don't want to be France.
That's all on the platform so far. I'm open to suggestions for other positions, like where would we stand on Free Trade? I'm for it, personally, but not for any good reasons. I think I just like the word "free". I'm also pro-not-fucking-up-the-environment, but I don't really know how to implement that. Maybe we should have an environmental summit, sort of a Big Business meets Hippie Tree Huggers in a "When Harry Met Sally" kind of thing.
Oh! And let's not forget our mascot. (And yes, I already own this one, thanks to The Whitley.)
Cue the balloons!
Wednesday, September 29, 2004
Al Gore, Sighs, Shakes Head Sadly
Part of the New Era of Crazy (I'm not linking to myself, just scroll) is the Lowering Of Expectations Game, where the campaigns abruptly shift from screaming about how awesome their candidate is to how much he sucks at debating. The logic is, if you beat expectations, then you win the debate. (If only my debate experience had been like that, er, wait... I liked having "street cred" - the immortal words of my partner.) Since it is the last month of the campaign, and everyone calls all hands on deck Al Gore offers some well chosen words:
While George Bush's campaign has made "lowering expectations" into a high art form, the record is clear - he's a skilled debater who uses the format to his advantage. There is no reason to expect any less this time around. And if anyone truly has "low expectations" for an incumbent president, that in itself is an issue.
Ouch. Before I knew it was Mr. Gore penning that piece, I was really surprised that a mere journalist would have big enough balls to say something that blunt.
All in all, I'm glad to see Al back in the political arena. He's a very smart man, and think he could have done great things for this country. I always thought he was a better governer than campaigner, but it is rare when good campaigners make good public officials. I hope Al figures out what to do with the rest of his days. He should talk to Jimmy Carter.
(Hat tip: Wonkette)
While George Bush's campaign has made "lowering expectations" into a high art form, the record is clear - he's a skilled debater who uses the format to his advantage. There is no reason to expect any less this time around. And if anyone truly has "low expectations" for an incumbent president, that in itself is an issue.
Ouch. Before I knew it was Mr. Gore penning that piece, I was really surprised that a mere journalist would have big enough balls to say something that blunt.
All in all, I'm glad to see Al back in the political arena. He's a very smart man, and think he could have done great things for this country. I always thought he was a better governer than campaigner, but it is rare when good campaigners make good public officials. I hope Al figures out what to do with the rest of his days. He should talk to Jimmy Carter.
(Hat tip: Wonkette)
Brett Austin By Another Name
Another Economist In Search Of Hate Mail
My favorite part is where he refutes his own argument. But, like Bush, he's always right. Yet another candidate for the SmartestManEver Title.
(I will try to find the Brett Austin article from the Torch. But the Torch sucks, so I doubt they have a decent website I can link to. Yes I ended a sentence with a preposition. Deal with it.)
Update on Brett Austin: I google'd him, but the closest thing I found was Jacob Grier telling me that the Torch has dropped that article into an abyss. Damn. A dollar for anyone who can produce the article. If you mail me a hard copy (of the original paper), I will also mail you a batch of cookies.
My favorite part is where he refutes his own argument. But, like Bush, he's always right. Yet another candidate for the SmartestManEver Title.
(I will try to find the Brett Austin article from the Torch. But the Torch sucks, so I doubt they have a decent website I can link to. Yes I ended a sentence with a preposition. Deal with it.)
Update on Brett Austin: I google'd him, but the closest thing I found was Jacob Grier telling me that the Torch has dropped that article into an abyss. Damn. A dollar for anyone who can produce the article. If you mail me a hard copy (of the original paper), I will also mail you a batch of cookies.
Now Colorado is Important
And Colorado has now taken it's place beside Ohio and Pennsylvania as States that Will Really Matter In The 2004 Election. For those who do not have time to fully pursue the internet because of things like "jobs" or "school," a quick summary. On Nov. 2, voters in Colorado will vote for President. More importantly, they will also vote on whether to stay with the current "Winner Takes All" System favored by 47 other states (technically, I suppose, 45 other states and 2 commonwealths - thanks Massachusetts and Virginia for being different) or to award the Electoral College delegates proportionally. (I'm assuming after 2000 all reasonably educated people know how the Electoral College system works. If you don't, you should be ashamed of yourself.) The really interesting thing is there is a stipulation in the proposition that would make it effectively immediately, which would almost certainly profoundly impact the outcome of the election. Colorado has 9 delegates, so even if the Dems lose the state (as we all assume they will), Kerry could pick up as many as 4 more delegates. In 2000, if only, blah, blah.
The part that amuses me is the people who oppose this idea, i.e. Republicans - see above - have named themselves "Coloradans Against a Really Stupid Idea." I like the upfront title with no possibility of gray area. It's refreshing.
But it does obscure the larger issue of Is This A Good Idea? I tend to think so, depending on how it is implemented. I know the way Maine does it is by county, since that's how the number of delegates is decided to start with(though I don't know what they do with the two extra delegates that represent the Senate? I shall look this up.) It's a Winner Takes All by county, which is cleaner than taking percentages.
The other reason I like this system is that it is totally up to the states (technically, state legislatures, which is why if this thing passes and it makes a difference, we're going to see Kerry v. Bush in the Supreme Court). Congress created a law back in the 60s (I think it was 64 but I could be getting my Civil Rights Act and Voting Acts confused) to switch to a direct voting system for primaries, but changing the Electoral College on a National Scale would require an Amendment to the Constitution, which would not pass. (PSCI 100 Lesson: Amendments require 2/3 of both houses of Congress IN ADDITION TO 3/4 of the State Legislatures. I'm still impressed that we managed to convince enough people that banning alcohol on a national scale was first a great idea and then a dismal failure.) Smaller swing states, like Ohio, would never support a National Amendment that would reduce their current disproportionate impact on the national election. 75% of 50 States is 37.5 States, so 38 State legislatures would have to approve the amendment (assuming Congress can be persuaded) Somewhere between 10 and 15 states are considered "swing states" and it would be in their self interest to vote down such an amendment.
Votes by county would totally change the way national elections are run, and would make them much more expensive. We'd have swing counties instead of swing states, and it would force candidates to make a much larger sweep of the country instead of 25 trips to Ohio. All the campaign finance laws would have to be rewritten, and public financing would put another burden on an already tight budget.
This TNR (the link might not show you the whole article, since TNR is really bitchy about making you pay for stuff) article thinks the Electoral College is stupid, which I disagree with, but he does point out some interesting "what ifs" involving Ralph "Douchbag-In-Chief" Nader.
Overall, we need to understand that the system will never be "fair" by everyone's standards, since no one is truly objective. To Paraphrase Orwell, any one system will be more fair to some people than to others. We just need to find a system that works, keep it constant and above all, enforce the rules. It won't - can't - be perfect, but we can only do our best.
The part that amuses me is the people who oppose this idea, i.e. Republicans - see above - have named themselves "Coloradans Against a Really Stupid Idea." I like the upfront title with no possibility of gray area. It's refreshing.
But it does obscure the larger issue of Is This A Good Idea? I tend to think so, depending on how it is implemented. I know the way Maine does it is by county, since that's how the number of delegates is decided to start with(though I don't know what they do with the two extra delegates that represent the Senate? I shall look this up.) It's a Winner Takes All by county, which is cleaner than taking percentages.
The other reason I like this system is that it is totally up to the states (technically, state legislatures, which is why if this thing passes and it makes a difference, we're going to see Kerry v. Bush in the Supreme Court). Congress created a law back in the 60s (I think it was 64 but I could be getting my Civil Rights Act and Voting Acts confused) to switch to a direct voting system for primaries, but changing the Electoral College on a National Scale would require an Amendment to the Constitution, which would not pass. (PSCI 100 Lesson: Amendments require 2/3 of both houses of Congress IN ADDITION TO 3/4 of the State Legislatures. I'm still impressed that we managed to convince enough people that banning alcohol on a national scale was first a great idea and then a dismal failure.) Smaller swing states, like Ohio, would never support a National Amendment that would reduce their current disproportionate impact on the national election. 75% of 50 States is 37.5 States, so 38 State legislatures would have to approve the amendment (assuming Congress can be persuaded) Somewhere between 10 and 15 states are considered "swing states" and it would be in their self interest to vote down such an amendment.
Votes by county would totally change the way national elections are run, and would make them much more expensive. We'd have swing counties instead of swing states, and it would force candidates to make a much larger sweep of the country instead of 25 trips to Ohio. All the campaign finance laws would have to be rewritten, and public financing would put another burden on an already tight budget.
This TNR (the link might not show you the whole article, since TNR is really bitchy about making you pay for stuff) article thinks the Electoral College is stupid, which I disagree with, but he does point out some interesting "what ifs" involving Ralph "Douchbag-In-Chief" Nader.
Overall, we need to understand that the system will never be "fair" by everyone's standards, since no one is truly objective. To Paraphrase Orwell, any one system will be more fair to some people than to others. We just need to find a system that works, keep it constant and above all, enforce the rules. It won't - can't - be perfect, but we can only do our best.
And after One Round of Jose Cuervo...
A private school in Alexandria accidentally served children margaritas. Sadly, the children though their "limeade" tasted funny and didn't drink it. The school acted promtly and sent the children home with a letter, as well as a story, about their brush with tequila.
The funniest part of this story is the ads at the bottom of the page. Apparently, WaPo has an automatic thing that advertises products that are related to the main story on the page. So, I can learn about why it is a bad idea to leave open and unlabeled containers of margaritas in school kitchens and buy a blender at the same time.
The funniest part of this story is the ads at the bottom of the page. Apparently, WaPo has an automatic thing that advertises products that are related to the main story on the page. So, I can learn about why it is a bad idea to leave open and unlabeled containers of margaritas in school kitchens and buy a blender at the same time.
Nader Watch: Nader is a Douchbag
I refrained from commenting on the story in yesterday's WaPo about Nader taking two seats in a crowed bus while little old ladies had to stand despite their little old lady status.
But today (it's the last item) the Post reports that Nader called them, pissed about the inaccuracies in the story.
Anything for additional press time, eh Ralph?
But today (it's the last item) the Post reports that Nader called them, pissed about the inaccuracies in the story.
Anything for additional press time, eh Ralph?
This is My Favorite Time of Year
I am so excited. This is my absolute favorite time of every four years, the time of Unmitigated Political Broo-Ha-Ha. There's about a month left until the final election, and absentee ballots have already been mailed in some places, so technically, the voting has already begun. Though I do love voting, that is not why I love this time of year. I love it because everyone just goes a little crazy, and they take the crazies within the party out of the cage.
Example: The Rev Jesse Jackson has been sent forth for Kerry.
Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!
Example: The Rev Jesse Jackson has been sent forth for Kerry.
Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!
Tuesday, September 28, 2004
Calling Mr. Webster
Football Fans for Truth.
Seriously.
I think we as the American people need to have a discussion about the word "Truth." You'd think we'd have covered it with President Clinton. Apparently not. "Truth" now means that you dig up stuff on John Kerry that makes him look bad, apparently. You don't really bother to fact check yourself, because you know that it's true.
Yes, yes, I know that we had "Texans for Truth" who looked into Bush's National Guard record, but they didn't get much attention, so they don't get to count. (Thanks, Dan Rather.)
But if this election is decided by who knows more about sports, then we deserve the shitty President that we're going to get.
God Bless America.
Seriously.
I think we as the American people need to have a discussion about the word "Truth." You'd think we'd have covered it with President Clinton. Apparently not. "Truth" now means that you dig up stuff on John Kerry that makes him look bad, apparently. You don't really bother to fact check yourself, because you know that it's true.
Yes, yes, I know that we had "Texans for Truth" who looked into Bush's National Guard record, but they didn't get much attention, so they don't get to count. (Thanks, Dan Rather.)
But if this election is decided by who knows more about sports, then we deserve the shitty President that we're going to get.
God Bless America.
Puppets
There are some who claim that Wonkette is just a "Profanity-laced and sex-obsessed...[a] vain, young, trash-mouthed skank" (it's on her website.) But disregard her at your peril. "Thursdays with Tina Brown" are an excellent example.
Tangent: I really want to know who Ms. Brown had to sleep with to get her job. Her articles are truly heinous.
Another more recent example is that lovely little press conference that Bush had so that Allawi could come over here and stump for the President, I mean, talk about the awesomeness that is Iraq. I heard the Press Conference live, due to the three hour time delay and rush-hour traffic, and I myself noted that Allawi sounded like Bush with a different accent. The speeches by both men were decent, but the unintentional comedy came during the Q&A. They only had about 4 answers between them, and they kept repeating them. (I sort of wished I was playing a drinking game where I got to drink every time they said "freedom". But drinking and driving at 9am makes Baby Jesus cry.) Wonkette has offered forth the theory that Allawi is Bush's puppet, i.e. that Bush has his hand up Allawi's ass. I thought this was merely an expression of the chip on her shoulder that she carries about Bush's homophobia, but today the Washington Post offers support for this theory. Alas, WaPo omits any thoughts of ass-fucking.
Tangent: I really want to know who Ms. Brown had to sleep with to get her job. Her articles are truly heinous.
Another more recent example is that lovely little press conference that Bush had so that Allawi could come over here and stump for the President, I mean, talk about the awesomeness that is Iraq. I heard the Press Conference live, due to the three hour time delay and rush-hour traffic, and I myself noted that Allawi sounded like Bush with a different accent. The speeches by both men were decent, but the unintentional comedy came during the Q&A. They only had about 4 answers between them, and they kept repeating them. (I sort of wished I was playing a drinking game where I got to drink every time they said "freedom". But drinking and driving at 9am makes Baby Jesus cry.) Wonkette has offered forth the theory that Allawi is Bush's puppet, i.e. that Bush has his hand up Allawi's ass. I thought this was merely an expression of the chip on her shoulder that she carries about Bush's homophobia, but today the Washington Post offers support for this theory. Alas, WaPo omits any thoughts of ass-fucking.
Wednesday, September 22, 2004
The Penis Game
I really can not wait until a woman runs for President. I can not wait to watch her campaign unfold and see how/if she decides to play that time honored classic, the Penis Game, also known as "Mine is Bigger than Yours." Straight guys play this game often (the jury is still out on gay guys), and straight women (and perhaps gay women, I haven't asked) secretly laugh at them. As men get older and more sophisticated, they learn to play the game more subtly, but they still play it.
But, we all know that having a big penis does help in politics. (I love the Wonkette Kerry Penis Watch) And I love that people other than me have been noticing the Bush/Kerry Penis Game play out recently.
Related: I have noticed through my years of observing the Penis Game that taller men usually seem to have the advantage. On the other hand, I have witnessed short women obliterate their opponents. Further study is obviously required.
But, we all know that having a big penis does help in politics. (I love the Wonkette Kerry Penis Watch) And I love that people other than me have been noticing the Bush/Kerry Penis Game play out recently.
Related: I have noticed through my years of observing the Penis Game that taller men usually seem to have the advantage. On the other hand, I have witnessed short women obliterate their opponents. Further study is obviously required.
Tuesday, September 21, 2004
I Heart Tom Toles
Political Cartoons Rock My World
This system won't let me copy the cartoon itself. It's almost as good as the one last year that showed a forlorn Clinton talking to his dog, "If only I had lied about the causes of war..."
It's funny because it's true.
This system won't let me copy the cartoon itself. It's almost as good as the one last year that showed a forlorn Clinton talking to his dog, "If only I had lied about the causes of war..."
It's funny because it's true.
The Only Rational Argument Left for Vietnam
In the Washington Post by E.J. Dionne, Jr:
"I'm as weary as you are that our politics veer away from what matters -- Iraq, terrorism, health care, jobs -- and get sidetracked into personal issues manufactured by political consultants and ideological zealots. But the Bush campaign has made clear it wants this election to focus on character and leadership. If character is the issue, the president's life, past and present, matters just as much as John Kerry's."
And then, only if it matters to people who still haven't made up their minds. The Democratic base is an energized as it is going to get, Bush-bashing just for the hell of it, is rather Republicanesque circa 1993, and I don't want to see my party come to that end.
"I'm as weary as you are that our politics veer away from what matters -- Iraq, terrorism, health care, jobs -- and get sidetracked into personal issues manufactured by political consultants and ideological zealots. But the Bush campaign has made clear it wants this election to focus on character and leadership. If character is the issue, the president's life, past and present, matters just as much as John Kerry's."
And then, only if it matters to people who still haven't made up their minds. The Democratic base is an energized as it is going to get, Bush-bashing just for the hell of it, is rather Republicanesque circa 1993, and I don't want to see my party come to that end.
Monday, September 20, 2004
At Least One Rational Voice
Wow. I don't always like David Broder - I especially hate his picture that gapes at me next to his byline. However, I completely agree with this column. Rest of the media, please takes notes.
Open Letter to the Media
Dear the Media:
First of all, by “the media” I would like to note that I am intending to address both for-profit established news organizations and the blogospheres.
I am so very tired of reading about Vietnam, either through the guise of John Kerry’s disputed medals or Bush’s service. Lots of people probably got medals that they really didn’t deserve and lots of people probably pulled strings to get out of going at all. Either way, I really don’t care. Please stop talking about it.
I am sick of listening to people bitch about how the candidates are not talking about “the issues.” News flash: the candidates ARE talking about the issues; it is the media is not. The media is covering Vietnam.
I have tried to understand. I know you can only report on a stump speech once. However, the media at large have been covering all these stupid events that happened 30 years ago in much greater details than the current stump speeches. Guess what. You actually are allowed to report on what is happening today. People will actually want to read about that. It might actually be useful to the overall campaign. But the media does not want to be useful, they want to be “edgy” and they have decided, apparently, that Vietnam-era bitch slapping is more edgy and more interesting than current news.
However, Kerry has made some excellent speeches, which I don’t read about. Apparently, Laura Bush has been telling us that “W Stands For Women” but I don’t know why, because no one covers that. If the media would focus as much attention on the substantive things that are happening on a daily basis about the things that should matter in deciding who to vote for as they do on fluffy look-at-me stories, our country would be a much better and more educated place.
I am starting a personal campaign. I will send a copy of this letter to any and all news organizations that show me stories about voter apathy, as well as today’s press release from both major presidential campaigns. (They are available on each candidate’s website: http://www.johnkerry.com/pressroom/ and http://www.georgewbush.com/News/) This election is incredibly important, and the voters know this. Please treat us like we are rational, sentient adults capable of making good decisions with good information. Otherwise, you are only weaving the hand baskets that are sending this country to hell.
Furthermore, please stop sticking the word “gate” on the end of a word to show that there is controversy surrounding that topic. Rathergate, Memogate, etc, all of these names are stupid, as were Monicagate and Margaritagate. See, here’s the thing: I understand that by sticking “gate” on the end of the word, it’s an attempt to be clever and make a reference to Watergate and Nixon. But – and this is the important part, so pay attention – the scandal that we refer to as “Watergate” had nothing to do with water. It was the name of a hotel, a hotel that I don’t even think is by much water. So, by calling something “Rathergate” and intending your readers to interpret it as “The Scandal Surrounding Dan Rather, CBS and Col. Killian’s alleged Memos About George W. Bush’s National Guard Service Or Lack Thereof,” you are actually making an ass of yourself.
Oh, and specifically to the bloggers that “broke” that whole CBS-got-duped thing. Congratulations. NO ONE CARES EXCEPT FOR YOU. And maybe CBS. Yes yes, overall, you did a good thing, but we’re done with that now. Fact-check some stump speeches and talk about how some of those are full of shit. Otherwise, you’re really not helping and you’re not cool and you’re not “anti-establishment.” So get with the program and stop annoying me.
Sincerely,
India McKinney
First of all, by “the media” I would like to note that I am intending to address both for-profit established news organizations and the blogospheres.
I am so very tired of reading about Vietnam, either through the guise of John Kerry’s disputed medals or Bush’s service. Lots of people probably got medals that they really didn’t deserve and lots of people probably pulled strings to get out of going at all. Either way, I really don’t care. Please stop talking about it.
I am sick of listening to people bitch about how the candidates are not talking about “the issues.” News flash: the candidates ARE talking about the issues; it is the media is not. The media is covering Vietnam.
I have tried to understand. I know you can only report on a stump speech once. However, the media at large have been covering all these stupid events that happened 30 years ago in much greater details than the current stump speeches. Guess what. You actually are allowed to report on what is happening today. People will actually want to read about that. It might actually be useful to the overall campaign. But the media does not want to be useful, they want to be “edgy” and they have decided, apparently, that Vietnam-era bitch slapping is more edgy and more interesting than current news.
However, Kerry has made some excellent speeches, which I don’t read about. Apparently, Laura Bush has been telling us that “W Stands For Women” but I don’t know why, because no one covers that. If the media would focus as much attention on the substantive things that are happening on a daily basis about the things that should matter in deciding who to vote for as they do on fluffy look-at-me stories, our country would be a much better and more educated place.
I am starting a personal campaign. I will send a copy of this letter to any and all news organizations that show me stories about voter apathy, as well as today’s press release from both major presidential campaigns. (They are available on each candidate’s website: http://www.johnkerry.com/pressroom/ and http://www.georgewbush.com/News/) This election is incredibly important, and the voters know this. Please treat us like we are rational, sentient adults capable of making good decisions with good information. Otherwise, you are only weaving the hand baskets that are sending this country to hell.
Furthermore, please stop sticking the word “gate” on the end of a word to show that there is controversy surrounding that topic. Rathergate, Memogate, etc, all of these names are stupid, as were Monicagate and Margaritagate. See, here’s the thing: I understand that by sticking “gate” on the end of the word, it’s an attempt to be clever and make a reference to Watergate and Nixon. But – and this is the important part, so pay attention – the scandal that we refer to as “Watergate” had nothing to do with water. It was the name of a hotel, a hotel that I don’t even think is by much water. So, by calling something “Rathergate” and intending your readers to interpret it as “The Scandal Surrounding Dan Rather, CBS and Col. Killian’s alleged Memos About George W. Bush’s National Guard Service Or Lack Thereof,” you are actually making an ass of yourself.
Oh, and specifically to the bloggers that “broke” that whole CBS-got-duped thing. Congratulations. NO ONE CARES EXCEPT FOR YOU. And maybe CBS. Yes yes, overall, you did a good thing, but we’re done with that now. Fact-check some stump speeches and talk about how some of those are full of shit. Otherwise, you’re really not helping and you’re not cool and you’re not “anti-establishment.” So get with the program and stop annoying me.
Sincerely,
India McKinney
Saturday, September 18, 2004
Quote That Actually Made Me Laugh Out Loud
Billchuck2 (10:29:51 PM): there's a roach on my wall, brb
It's funny because ... I should be drinking.
It's funny because ... I should be drinking.
Friday, September 17, 2004
Democrats Make Babies Cry
Democrats make babies cry, and the Bushies are liers.
Half of the above statement is true. Those lucky people who can figue on which half win an ever-growing defecit and 1000+ dead Americans in Iraq.
You know, Bush thinks that God wants him to be President, but someone really should tell him that lies make Baby Jesus cry.
Half of the above statement is true. Those lucky people who can figue on which half win an ever-growing defecit and 1000+ dead Americans in Iraq.
You know, Bush thinks that God wants him to be President, but someone really should tell him that lies make Baby Jesus cry.
Thursday, September 16, 2004
Jesus Wants YOU!
More about what God wants. Apparently, God wanted Bush to be President on September 11, 2001, according to the Southern Baptists. Apparently, Bush also told them that God spoke to him and told him to run for President? Now, I talk to God as much as the next girl, but I'd like to point out an inconsistency: if someone seen as more liberal talks to God, we think they're crazy. But when a good ol' boy talks to God, then that's the way it's supposed to be.
I sort of wish the left would start claiming that God told them to do stuff, or that God was punishing the Bushies. Actually, my mother sent me a link the other day that comes close to that. Personally, I was more amused than anything else (and half of that was at the idea of my mother reading blogs...she only discovered what they are maybe a week ago), but it would be interesting to hear that argument from a left-wing wack job. God knows we have plenty of those...
I sort of wish the left would start claiming that God told them to do stuff, or that God was punishing the Bushies. Actually, my mother sent me a link the other day that comes close to that. Personally, I was more amused than anything else (and half of that was at the idea of my mother reading blogs...she only discovered what they are maybe a week ago), but it would be interesting to hear that argument from a left-wing wack job. God knows we have plenty of those...
Shades of Purple
At first, I liked the idea presented in this article: he doesn't want to be a member of a "blue" state or a "red" state, he wants to be purple. I thought it was going in the direction of Obama's Convention speech (have I mentioned how much I love this man?) - we play Little League in the Blue States, and we have gay friends in the Red States, etc.
But then it takes a turn for the bad, blaming Democrats still pissed about 2000 for splashing a little "red" into his otherwise "blue" opinion about Indecision 2004. The author says it would be much easier to oppose Bush if the Democrats weren't so fanatical in their dislike of Bush, suggesting relocation to Canada and other countries with leaders less idiotic. He wants to hear "moderation" from the Democratic camp and less rampant ABB-itis.
As justification for the Democratic misguided sense of reality, he quotes the statistic that 51% of Democrats think that "U.S. wrongdoing" helped cause the World Trade Centers to collapse and says that therefore Democrats essentially agree with bin Laden - cue Cheney and the terrorism quote. (For anyone who wonders, I am boycotting the use of the term "9/11" to refer to the events that happened on September 11, 2001. We don't refer to the events that happened on December 7, 1941 as "12/7" because it makes no sense. Anyway.) Personally, I don't really understand why so many Americans continue to think that we DIDN'T help create the environment that led to the undertaking of such a massive act of terrorism.
Caveat: I would definitely put myself into the category of Democrats still pissed about that stolen election and our appointed President. However, I am also stunned that so many Americans seemed to have missed the memo about why many countries see us as the Great Satan.
For starters, let's look at Americans like Alan Bloom, Jerry Falwell, et al, who make their living telling other Americans why our country is driving the bus to Hell. Add in a healthy dose of Unilateral tramping/Colonialism/Disrespect for all things Foreign, and duh, people hate us.
Furthermore, many people, myself included, do not think the Dems have done enough to illustrate the many problems with the Bush administration, to "demonize" Bush as the Republicans have been "demonizing" Kerry. Of the two campaigns, the GOP has done much more successful demonizing, so, Mr. Richard Cohen, by your logic, you should be MORE gloriously blue, not red-splashed purple.
But then it takes a turn for the bad, blaming Democrats still pissed about 2000 for splashing a little "red" into his otherwise "blue" opinion about Indecision 2004. The author says it would be much easier to oppose Bush if the Democrats weren't so fanatical in their dislike of Bush, suggesting relocation to Canada and other countries with leaders less idiotic. He wants to hear "moderation" from the Democratic camp and less rampant ABB-itis.
As justification for the Democratic misguided sense of reality, he quotes the statistic that 51% of Democrats think that "U.S. wrongdoing" helped cause the World Trade Centers to collapse and says that therefore Democrats essentially agree with bin Laden - cue Cheney and the terrorism quote. (For anyone who wonders, I am boycotting the use of the term "9/11" to refer to the events that happened on September 11, 2001. We don't refer to the events that happened on December 7, 1941 as "12/7" because it makes no sense. Anyway.) Personally, I don't really understand why so many Americans continue to think that we DIDN'T help create the environment that led to the undertaking of such a massive act of terrorism.
Caveat: I would definitely put myself into the category of Democrats still pissed about that stolen election and our appointed President. However, I am also stunned that so many Americans seemed to have missed the memo about why many countries see us as the Great Satan.
For starters, let's look at Americans like Alan Bloom, Jerry Falwell, et al, who make their living telling other Americans why our country is driving the bus to Hell. Add in a healthy dose of Unilateral tramping/Colonialism/Disrespect for all things Foreign, and duh, people hate us.
Furthermore, many people, myself included, do not think the Dems have done enough to illustrate the many problems with the Bush administration, to "demonize" Bush as the Republicans have been "demonizing" Kerry. Of the two campaigns, the GOP has done much more successful demonizing, so, Mr. Richard Cohen, by your logic, you should be MORE gloriously blue, not red-splashed purple.
Well, darn
Bummer. The intern in the HR department at the Shit Job went back to school yesterday, so I've been drafted from the Accounting Department doing nothing to doing all the work that she didn't do. Apparently, there was actually work for her to do, but she couldn't figure out how to do it. She is not a good trained monkey. Although, judging from the stunning lack of office supplies in her desk, I'm not surprised she didn't get things done. She'd never had a job before, and it showed to everyone involved. She would file things in the random order that they appeared on her desk, not in alphabetical order.
So, now I get to do her filing...and xeroxing...and more filing...
Good thing: I'm not bored off my ass, and I actually have a reason to show up to work.
Bad thing: less time to browse the inner workings of the internet. And write cover letters. And research jobs. And email everyone and their mom.
All in all, I think I'll be okay. This internet connection is faster than my ghetto Accounting computer, and since I'm still technically supposed to be working up there, I'll just disappear for a while and go do my random shit. After all, why write cover letters on my own time when I can get paid to do it?
So, now I get to do her filing...and xeroxing...and more filing...
Good thing: I'm not bored off my ass, and I actually have a reason to show up to work.
Bad thing: less time to browse the inner workings of the internet. And write cover letters. And research jobs. And email everyone and their mom.
All in all, I think I'll be okay. This internet connection is faster than my ghetto Accounting computer, and since I'm still technically supposed to be working up there, I'll just disappear for a while and go do my random shit. After all, why write cover letters on my own time when I can get paid to do it?
Tuesday, September 14, 2004
Now I Know Why George W. Bush Won in 2000
And it wasn’t those little hanging chads, though apparently we still get to blame the old people in Florida. According to this article in today's Washington Post, while convicted felons cannot vote, people with Alzheimer’s or with diagnosed dementia can. And since most people who suffer from dementia are old, and Florida has a disproportionate old people population, we get to blame them. (though I hear that many of them have decided that shoveling snow in New England is better than triple hurricanes)
Of course, the problem now becomes in the solution. Are we going to prevent dementia patients from voting? And if so, how are we going to determine that they are too dementia’d to vote? Quote from the article:
The difficulty is in drawing the line of who is entitled to vote and who is not," said Henderson, a professor of neurology at Stanford University. "Someone who is illiterate can vote. Someone who is intoxicated can vote. . . . It's easy to say people with dementia shouldn't vote, but once you look at the complexity of the issue, the solutions aren't easy.
If someone does introduce a bill to limit voting to those without dementia, I predict a) the race card b) the Southern card (a.k.a. The Redneck Discrimination card) c) the Education Bias card d) the Gay card e) the Political Bias card…and the list goes on and on. Now, these things would be exhaustingly mundane to most people, and they will probably get out of hand. However, this is a problem that is definitely worth talking about. I believe that all citizens should have the right to vote, but I also believe that before voting, those intending to do so have a civic responsibility to research their vote. However, I do not think it’s a good idea to legislate that. It does not need to be tempting to classify those intending to vote for Bush in 2004 because he’s a strong, decisive leader in the War on Terror or because of his strong economic policy as too politically uneducated to vote (or as victims of dementia). Another WaPo quote:
But Adam Butler of the Disability Rights Center in Little Rock said such talk holds people with disabilities to a higher standard than the rest of the population. No tests of mental competence are required to stand for office, and no law prevents "competent" voters from choosing candidates for questionable reasons: "People may vote because they like the way George W. Bush looks or because they like Heinz ketchup."
I’m refraining from all Arkansas/Disability jokes, as well as Bush/Monkey jokes.
P.S. I’ll send you a check for a dollar if you can give me a verifiable story of someone voting while drunk.
Of course, the problem now becomes in the solution. Are we going to prevent dementia patients from voting? And if so, how are we going to determine that they are too dementia’d to vote? Quote from the article:
The difficulty is in drawing the line of who is entitled to vote and who is not," said Henderson, a professor of neurology at Stanford University. "Someone who is illiterate can vote. Someone who is intoxicated can vote. . . . It's easy to say people with dementia shouldn't vote, but once you look at the complexity of the issue, the solutions aren't easy.
If someone does introduce a bill to limit voting to those without dementia, I predict a) the race card b) the Southern card (a.k.a. The Redneck Discrimination card) c) the Education Bias card d) the Gay card e) the Political Bias card…and the list goes on and on. Now, these things would be exhaustingly mundane to most people, and they will probably get out of hand. However, this is a problem that is definitely worth talking about. I believe that all citizens should have the right to vote, but I also believe that before voting, those intending to do so have a civic responsibility to research their vote. However, I do not think it’s a good idea to legislate that. It does not need to be tempting to classify those intending to vote for Bush in 2004 because he’s a strong, decisive leader in the War on Terror or because of his strong economic policy as too politically uneducated to vote (or as victims of dementia). Another WaPo quote:
But Adam Butler of the Disability Rights Center in Little Rock said such talk holds people with disabilities to a higher standard than the rest of the population. No tests of mental competence are required to stand for office, and no law prevents "competent" voters from choosing candidates for questionable reasons: "People may vote because they like the way George W. Bush looks or because they like Heinz ketchup."
I’m refraining from all Arkansas/Disability jokes, as well as Bush/Monkey jokes.
P.S. I’ll send you a check for a dollar if you can give me a verifiable story of someone voting while drunk.
Monday, September 13, 2004
New Record
Today, I think I created a record. I did about 30 minutes of work today, but only if I round up. Seriously. I took a form letter, changed the names and the addresses (probably 10 total words), printed it, xeroxed it, mailed the original and put the copy on top of the filing cabinet for someone else to file. Please, The Universe, send me a job that uses my talents...
Well, Shit
So, I found this article in my beloved Washington Post, talking about the new levels of competition for Hill jobs. Thanks, the Washington Post, I appreciate the optimism.
The trickle down effect also means that all other DC jobs will also have more competition, from temp jobs to... waiting tables, I'm told. It's not surprising, rent is expensive, and we have to make money someway.
My new plan: buy the LSAT book today, and get to work on that test. Plan B is more student loans and a deferred job start date...
Maybe I should reconsider this shit job?
The trickle down effect also means that all other DC jobs will also have more competition, from temp jobs to... waiting tables, I'm told. It's not surprising, rent is expensive, and we have to make money someway.
My new plan: buy the LSAT book today, and get to work on that test. Plan B is more student loans and a deferred job start date...
Maybe I should reconsider this shit job?
I Would Have Their Babies
For every idiot in politics, there is a counter. For example, Andrew Sullivan, the leading gay conservative (he used to consider himself a Republican, but I'm not so sure anymore.) He's awesome. As is Joel Stein, who writes in TIME magazine. I'd link to it, but if you don't subscribe to TIME, you wouldn't get to read his article. But I will read anything he writes, because it is always worth the effort.
Actually, I take it back. New Statement: For every 10 idiots in politics, there is a counter. Or whatever. Barack Obama, Andrew Sullivan, Joel Stein. I would have their babies.
Actually, I take it back. New Statement: For every 10 idiots in politics, there is a counter. Or whatever. Barack Obama, Andrew Sullivan, Joel Stein. I would have their babies.
Thursday, September 09, 2004
Invoking the J word
There are some people who think that politics is boring. I do not understand these people. Campaigns are by far the most interesting things ever, though I will admit that learning about how your pancreas can accidentally start to ingest your scrotum has a level of fascination. (For any and all questions about that, I suggest you contact Matt Israel. The above sentence nicely summarizes all I know about that particular topic.) Not only do we once again have politicians challenging each other to duels, Alan Keyes has essentially asked the people of Illinois WWJD? Actually, to be fair, Keyes does not ask the question, he just tells voters what Jesus would NOT do: Jesus would not vote for Barack Obama because Obama kills babies.
Now, I should mention that Barack Obama is my favorite politician. I want to work for him/have his babies (too bad he already has children). He gave a fantastic speech at the DNC, which is why I like him. I like politicians who understand the art of speech giving. It's a lost art, and I would love to see Barack do well because he has mastered it. Plus, he's not crazy, which brings us back to Alan Keyes, who tried to tell voters that Obama was anti-black. WTF, Alan?
But by far the best part is when the reporters asked Alan Keyes who Jesus would vote for in the upcoming Senate election, Keyes himself or a third party candidate. Keyes responded that it was up for the voters to decide. (Keyes only knows what Jesus doesn't like, he hasn't a clue as to what Jesus does like.)
In a way, I sort of feel bad for Keyes. The RNC couldn't find anyone sane to run against Obama because no one sane wants to spend time and money in a race that they know they are going to lose. So, the RNC looked around for its resident bunch of crazies, eliminated those working in the White House, and shipped in Keyes from Maryland. They figure it's less embarrassing to have Keyes running than to have Obama unopposed. Then, at least Obama has to campaign for himself rather than for Kerry. I suppose Keyes is happy, because he's at least in the papers. So, I don't feel sorry for Keyes, I feel sorry for the people running his campaign.
Now, I should mention that Barack Obama is my favorite politician. I want to work for him/have his babies (too bad he already has children). He gave a fantastic speech at the DNC, which is why I like him. I like politicians who understand the art of speech giving. It's a lost art, and I would love to see Barack do well because he has mastered it. Plus, he's not crazy, which brings us back to Alan Keyes, who tried to tell voters that Obama was anti-black. WTF, Alan?
But by far the best part is when the reporters asked Alan Keyes who Jesus would vote for in the upcoming Senate election, Keyes himself or a third party candidate. Keyes responded that it was up for the voters to decide. (Keyes only knows what Jesus doesn't like, he hasn't a clue as to what Jesus does like.)
In a way, I sort of feel bad for Keyes. The RNC couldn't find anyone sane to run against Obama because no one sane wants to spend time and money in a race that they know they are going to lose. So, the RNC looked around for its resident bunch of crazies, eliminated those working in the White House, and shipped in Keyes from Maryland. They figure it's less embarrassing to have Keyes running than to have Obama unopposed. Then, at least Obama has to campaign for himself rather than for Kerry. I suppose Keyes is happy, because he's at least in the papers. So, I don't feel sorry for Keyes, I feel sorry for the people running his campaign.
Wednesday, September 08, 2004
Dueling Politicos
Perhaps Jimmy Carter should challenge Zell Miller to a duel.Otherwise, we're really not accomplishing anything. All we're doing is prolonging Zell's spotlight. He's a crazy old man who's about to retire, we should let him do it in peace. Obviously, this is a fun story, which is why we're still talking about it, but it either needs to end, or we need to get out the antique pistols. Or just put Howard Dean and Zell Miller in a
padded room together, shut the door, and see who comes out alive.
Actually, that's not a bad idea for a reality show. It's like "The Real World: Washington D.C." I'd watch it. I'm calling Fox.
padded room together, shut the door, and see who comes out alive.
Actually, that's not a bad idea for a reality show. It's like "The Real World: Washington D.C." I'd watch it. I'm calling Fox.
One in the Hand?
So, I wrote two posts yesterday, and the internet ate them. Damn the internet.
Today, I got offered a job. Sort of. My boss at the shit job called me into his office today and asked if I had considered staying on California. They like the work that I do, and they think I would be a fantastic permanent addition to the department. Obviously, I told him that I’m planning on moving to DC in the near future, but I’m sort of reconsidering. That whole one-in-the-hand thing is messing me up. See, it’s not like the organization I work for is unworthy. I work in the Accounting Department in the Westside Regional Center. The footer on our letterhead says, “Committed to Providing Support and Services to People with Developmental Disabilities.” Basically, the State of California gives money to people with developmental disabilities (we call them “clients,” a term that I plan to continue using, since it is a good neutral term) and WRC manages it for them. It’s a good cause…I just don’t want to be a) in the Accounting Department or b) continue as a bitch, er, Administrative Assistant. Of course I do this job well. A trained monkey could do this job well, and I’d like to think that I’m a better employee than a trained monkey. Plus, I spent four years refining the art of ass kissing.
Staying here and working would be a far easier road than moving to DC. I would definitely definitely get pissed off and go to law school, which might be a good overall thing. But then, I’d still be wanting to go to DC, and then I’d have even more money to pay back, and I wouldn’t be young or uneducated enough to be alright starting at the bottom. So, I’d only be delaying the current issues I have with the status quo. Sigh…
Maybe I should just get married, live in a trailer and make babies. But no, that wouldn’t pay off the loans either. What’s a girl to do?
Today, I got offered a job. Sort of. My boss at the shit job called me into his office today and asked if I had considered staying on California. They like the work that I do, and they think I would be a fantastic permanent addition to the department. Obviously, I told him that I’m planning on moving to DC in the near future, but I’m sort of reconsidering. That whole one-in-the-hand thing is messing me up. See, it’s not like the organization I work for is unworthy. I work in the Accounting Department in the Westside Regional Center. The footer on our letterhead says, “Committed to Providing Support and Services to People with Developmental Disabilities.” Basically, the State of California gives money to people with developmental disabilities (we call them “clients,” a term that I plan to continue using, since it is a good neutral term) and WRC manages it for them. It’s a good cause…I just don’t want to be a) in the Accounting Department or b) continue as a bitch, er, Administrative Assistant. Of course I do this job well. A trained monkey could do this job well, and I’d like to think that I’m a better employee than a trained monkey. Plus, I spent four years refining the art of ass kissing.
Staying here and working would be a far easier road than moving to DC. I would definitely definitely get pissed off and go to law school, which might be a good overall thing. But then, I’d still be wanting to go to DC, and then I’d have even more money to pay back, and I wouldn’t be young or uneducated enough to be alright starting at the bottom. So, I’d only be delaying the current issues I have with the status quo. Sigh…
Maybe I should just get married, live in a trailer and make babies. But no, that wouldn’t pay off the loans either. What’s a girl to do?
Ass Comments
It Could be Worse for SlantPants
RE: Mormon Mass Producers
Best Quote:
"We all know one another, and we're basically close-knit," said Patsy
Kellogg, director of the Schleicher County Community Resource Center,
which administers local welfare programs. "We don't want anyone to mess up our little world. We're very secure here. . . . I hope they stay on their own ground and they don't register to vote."
RE: Mormon Mass Producers
Best Quote:
"We all know one another, and we're basically close-knit," said Patsy
Kellogg, director of the Schleicher County Community Resource Center,
which administers local welfare programs. "We don't want anyone to mess up our little world. We're very secure here. . . . I hope they stay on their own ground and they don't register to vote."
Tuesday, September 07, 2004
Back to Work, Jiggity Jig
So, I actually spent the day doing work, so there was only time to read things and not write about them. However, I did discover some gems, about which I have thought. The typing does not require thinking, so I just have lots of thoughts...and no where to put them.
Swift Boat Old Farts for Truth (or whatever) have spawned yet more ridiculousness into the political arena. We now have Texans for Truth to make sure that we're all still talking about things that happened before I was born. Guess what, Old Farts, no one cares. Moving on please? To things that matter, like more Bushisms. Those are the important things that we should be voting on.
In a related story, in the category Useless Things That We're Still Talking About But Make Awesome Media, I have a feeling Zell Miller and his dueling isn't going away anytime soon. I'm going to start challenging people to duels. I feel this is a good way to deal with our anger and frustrations while still acting like mature adults.
It was a good news day. Now I must go watch a Vandy Footballplayer Alumnus make an ass of himself. They've paired him with a flaming gay guy from New York. Oh MTV, can we pretend like we're not TRYING to create massive issues? That would make this show more watchable. Oh well.
Swift Boat Old Farts for Truth (or whatever) have spawned yet more ridiculousness into the political arena. We now have Texans for Truth to make sure that we're all still talking about things that happened before I was born. Guess what, Old Farts, no one cares. Moving on please? To things that matter, like more Bushisms. Those are the important things that we should be voting on.
In a related story, in the category Useless Things That We're Still Talking About But Make Awesome Media, I have a feeling Zell Miller and his dueling isn't going away anytime soon. I'm going to start challenging people to duels. I feel this is a good way to deal with our anger and frustrations while still acting like mature adults.
It was a good news day. Now I must go watch a Vandy Footballplayer Alumnus make an ass of himself. They've paired him with a flaming gay guy from New York. Oh MTV, can we pretend like we're not TRYING to create massive issues? That would make this show more watchable. Oh well.
Sunday, September 05, 2004
Ahh, Lazy Sundays...
It's a lovely hot day in Southern California, and I am sitting by the open deck door enjoying not being cold. (This is a problem in my life, especially by open deck doors in Southern California.) But September is one of the warmest months in LA, a fact which I had forgotten, since I'm usually in Nashville by now. So it's weird.
I have decided to spend the day catching up on my reading. All sorts of fun things happened while I was gone, and I feel the need to get caught up. Thoughts on the State of the World as they occur...
Total Ass Comment on My Part
I have decided to spend the day catching up on my reading. All sorts of fun things happened while I was gone, and I feel the need to get caught up. Thoughts on the State of the World as they occur...
Total Ass Comment on My Part
Saturday, September 04, 2004
In the Beginning
Alrighty boys and girls, since I do not currently have enough to do in my life, I figured I'd start a blog, like everyone else and their dog. See, I have thoughts and ideas, that I have the need to share with the world, only most of my friends have better things to do than sit in front of a computer all day.
Anyway, here goes nothing...
Anyway, here goes nothing...
