Wednesday, October 06, 2004
Hold the Cheese
I'm starting to be ashamed of myself. I was actually distraught last night when I discovered that I was watching the post-debate spin rather than the Real World...too late to fix the problem, and I now have to figure out one of the 20,000 times MTV will run it before next week. (Oo! Problem solved. Tune in an hour early when they run down last week's episode! Awesome.) I switched from the a Daily Show commercial to Newlyweds AND FORGOT TO FLIP BACK. (It was okay though, Jessica Simpson getting eye surgery was funnier than Billy Bob Thornton). Actually, that last one isn't so bad. I've loved to hate watching the Newlyweds (When are they no longer "newly wed"?) even when I had things to do.
So, in that vein, articles like this rock my world. The best part (does anyone else get too lazy to click the links in blogs? I do sometimes. That's why I stick stuff in.):
I think it's the mental image thing. Actually, now that I think about it, all the stuff that has made me crack up recently involves mental imagery...Kerry's ass; Super-Nader; John Edwards on his chair screaming "LIAR LIAR PANTS ON FIRE!" at Dr. Evil/Dick Cheney; ironing a rhino... I got that last one off of a popsicle stick a few years ago. No one else thinks it's funny, but I see a 50s era Lucy Ricardo-esque woman chasing down a pack of rhinos in some field in Africa, iron in hand, electrical cord flapping in the breeze. And that's funny to me.
So, in that vein, articles like this rock my world. The best part (does anyone else get too lazy to click the links in blogs? I do sometimes. That's why I stick stuff in.):
Asked if one of his daughters was more like him than the other, he responded, and I swear to God I'm transcribing word-for-word: "Yes. No. Well that's ... gosh, I'd like to say yes, but I guess ... yes, the answer is yes." Which daughter, Mrs. Dr. Phil inquired? "Well, that's why I hesitated. Because in some ways my daughter Alexandra is more like me, but in other ways my daughter Vanessa is more like me." Senator? It's not an appropriations bill with riders. Just pick a name! Memo to Joe Lockhart: For the remaining three weeks of the campaign, do not let your candidate appear to vacillate on any subject, no matter how trivial. When he pulls into the fast-food drive-through on a campaign stop, have him bellow "COMBO CLASSIC, HOLD THE CHEESE!" before the intercom even comes on, and keep on repeating it at top volume until the last french fry has vanished down his gullet.
I think it's the mental image thing. Actually, now that I think about it, all the stuff that has made me crack up recently involves mental imagery...Kerry's ass; Super-Nader; John Edwards on his chair screaming "LIAR LIAR PANTS ON FIRE!" at Dr. Evil/Dick Cheney; ironing a rhino... I got that last one off of a popsicle stick a few years ago. No one else thinks it's funny, but I see a 50s era Lucy Ricardo-esque woman chasing down a pack of rhinos in some field in Africa, iron in hand, electrical cord flapping in the breeze. And that's funny to me.
